Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Night Waker

I love going through old blog posts and photos and remembering! Each post, each photo, holds a moment or feeling, frozen in time. 

You guys, this is why I blog. I don't do it for the followers. I don't do it for the likes. Though I appreciate the support and the connections I form with others through doing so. But that's not why I blog. I do it for myself. I do it for my husband. I do it for my children. These reasons alone are why I make it a point to find the time to fill this space with photos and words written from my heart. You could say I'm quite obsessed with preserving memories. I know my babies will thank me later. 

I originally wrote and posted Night Waker in July 2014. Reading it now made me just as teary as it did when I wrote it then. 

The only difference now is if I get a sleepy night waker in my bedroom at 2:30am, I don't carry them back to their own bed, I let them stay. 

I am forever learning, forever changing, forever growing in my Mama mind, heart, and soul. I know it's only a matter of time before my children stop coming to our room, stop needing us in the middle of the night. I know the time is coming, though I wish it never would. So instead of carrying them or sending them back off to their own bed, my heart says let them stay. Let them snuggle. Let them have that time. They need it, otherwise they wouldn't be there at our bedside asking for us. So I listen. I let them stay. I let them snuggle. And my soul just eats it up. 

Night Waker

It starts with a whimper
Just a soft, sweet whimper
And all too soon I hear your tiny feet pit-pat-pattering on the floor
Groggily I roll out of bed
It's 2:30 in the morning, my clock tells me so
I meet you in our doorway, your arms already stretched out
I pluck you off the floor in one fell swoop
Your little arms wrap around my neck and your little legs around my waist
Your head rests upon my shoulder and you sigh a real deep sigh
What's on your mind, my little one?
What's woke you from your slumber?
I hold you tight and sway my hips
Dancing in the doorway with my sleepy night waker
Ever so slowly we make our way back to your room
Step by step, sway by sway, my bare feet on the cold floor
The moonlight filters through the living room windows
The curtains ruffle slightly in the night breeze
The house is still and quiet
As tired as I am, my heart whispers to go slow
I know better than to rush this moment
This most perfect moment that all too soon will be but an old Mama's memory
Standing by your bed now, I can't seem to lay you down
My arms squeeze you tighter and I softly rub your back
Your eyes start to close as I kiss your messy bed head
In the soft glow of your nightlight, my heart pounds with so much love
I close my eyes and soak up the moment
Sweet one, I would hold you for a million years if I could!
But time doesn't stop, no matter how much I wish it would
So down you finally go and I gently tuck you in
As I tip-toe out of your room and back into my own
I thank God for this moment 
This 2:30 in the morning, dancing in the moonlight, gone by too fast 
Perfect moment with my sleepy night waker

With love,
Mama Hauck

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