Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Revisiting: Working On It.

I came to the realization a few weeks back that I needed to take a step back, take a deep breath, and do a little soul searching. 

I find myself needing to do this when in one or more aspects of my life, I feel the storm clouds brewing and slowly closing in on me, affecting my mood and overall happiness. 

A few years back I did a post about all the changes I wanted to make in my life, called Working On It. I feel as if recently I need to remind myself of one of the most important changes I wanted to make.....

6. Quite possibly the biggest change I'd like to see is with my relationships. I need to choose who is worth my time and energy, who is not, and then cut my losses. Fair weather friends have no place in my life. I don't like being used or called upon only when it is convenient for the other person. I give all my love and go out of my way for those I care about and would like to receive that in return. Too many times I give and give and give of myself to someone, only to be dropped and ignored and left feeling like a fool when I am no longer convenient for them or the next best thing comes along. That's incredibly hurtful. I deserve more. I want someone to be my friend for the sole purpose of loving me and wanting the joy of my friendship. I know I deserve that. 

After a period of stormy weather, I have seen the sunshine again and am feeling the sweet relief of a mending heart, a more confident self, and an enlightened mood. 

Onward I march! Always forward. Striving to better myself, my life, and the life of my loved ones. 

With love,
Mama Hauck 

1 comment:

  1. I know that feeling so well, it's something that I seem to struggle with all the time. I've been trying to speak up more when I feel the situation warrants it and I've had A LOT of those conversations with my sister lately. It's hard because she's family and my only sibling, but she uses me. And she doesn't put any effort into a relationship with me until she needs something and then tries to make me feel guilty if I can't drop everything to help her. But some of her requests! They boggle my mind, she seems to forget that I have kids of my own that require a lot of my attention. And it just makes me sad because I wish we were close, I wish we were the best of friends who actually spent tons of time together, but I don't think we ever will. If she was a friend, I would walk away, but since she's my sister, I kind of feel like I just have to deal with it and continue trying to speak up and make her understand that our relationship isn't balanced. But your words are a good reminder that I can say no and don't have to feel guilty, especially because I know I've tried my best and I deserve more.


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