Monday, August 27, 2012

I'll Cry If I Want To

School is coming. Anthony starts September 6th and Molly starts the 11th.

I'm in panic mode. 

I'm so anxious I could throw up. 

I feel like EVERYTHING is about to change. 

Gosh, sometimes I just don't do well with change. 

And I fret too much. WAY too much.

I picture Anthony getting on the bus and going, "Wait....what about my booster seat? There's no seat belts on this thing? But Mama says I always have to wear a seat belt. What about my drink cup? You mean I don't get to have my fucking drink cup!?" Ok....maybe without the swearing. That part is all me. What about when he's in class and has to use the bathroom? Will he know to ask if he has to go? Will he worry about how clean he got his bum? He worries about that, you know. Is he going to stand there, pants at his ankles in the little boy's room wondering who the crap is going to check his bum!?

Oh my. 

And why does Kindergarten have to be ALL day? Really? You're going to take my boy away from me from 7:30 in the morning till 4 in the afternoon (this includes bus time....we live out in the boonies, remember?)? Damn you school!! This is FAR too long for me to be without him. 


I know all will be well and I'm getting myself all worked up over nothing, but I'm a Mama and that's how I roll. And yes, I also know I'm being a little selfish with not wanting to share him with the world, but this big boy school thing is all new to me and I'm having a hard time coping.

And Molly? That little bird is ready to fly. She's practically running out the front door to preschool. 

I don't remember giving time permission to fly when I blinked.

Today Anthony has his first soccer meet (the one I talked about a bit ago wound up not being a meet for him....how annoying. He was so sad when I tried to explain to him the mix up.). He'll have his meets every Monday and Thursday at 6. Games will be on Saturdays. This will go till the end of October. Then I think I'm going to get him into wrestling. I heard that's free and a few of Anthony's friends will be doing it. That'll be something fun him and Sam can do together in the evenings.

Tomorrow Anthony and Molly have their 5 and 3 year well child check ups. Sam will actually be taking off work early to take them so I don't have to fuss with a baby and two children who might be getting vaccinations. I'll enjoy the break from doctor visit duty and spend my time with Timothy getting a few projects done at home that I've been wanting to do. Or maybe I'll go and wait in the car. Either way, not stepping foot in the doctor's office will be great.

Wednesday we have a play date at the park with one of Anthony's friends, then it's his Kindergarten open house at 5:30. I'll be sure to plaster a smile on my face even though I'll be crying on the inside. 

Thursday it's another soccer practice. 

Sunday we have a birthday party to go to. 

Monday soccer practice and another birthday party. 

Wednesday Molly has her open house at the preschool. 

Thursday......Yeah, that's Anthony's first day of school. Lord help me to not cry like a baby at the bus stop! 

Throw in the following week Molly's first day of school, Sam being gone to Denver for a week, and a baby shower and you have one physically, mentally, and emotionally tired Mama! I only assume that busy schedule will just continue to go on and on and on from here on out.

Welcome to the life of a Mama with school aged children!

Don't tell me not to, because I'll cry if I want to.

With love,
Mama Hauck


  1. I worried about the bathroom thing with Piper too, she's lucky though because she has a bathroom right in her class so I don't have to worry about her wandering around the huge (to her) school and having to share with older kids. They also started her on half days so she doesn't go full time until next week. That was nice, it gives her the chance to get used the more structured kindergarten environment. I'm sure Anthony will do great! Piper loves it and we haven't had any issues with her being scared or not wanting to go. But, I do get sad every time I think about how big she seems now and even though she's only been in school for a week, she seems like such a different kid already! It was pretty hard for me not to cry as I left her there that first day though so you go ahead and cry if you need to! :)

  2. I'm glad there's someone out there that shares my same concerns. Sometimes it's hard to get others to understand, and then I'm left feeling silly. I know I probably worry too much....but having him go from being with me 24/7 to school ALL day will be tough. *sigh*

    I'm glad Piper is liking school so much, that's fantastic! They do change quick, don't they? I thought the same thing when Anthony was in preschool after only a few days. I can't imagine how much he'll grow and change throughout this next year.

    Why do kids have to grow up so fast!?


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